Photography

Soapy bought me a new camera!! I will admit, it is way more than I ever expected and way more camera than I actually need to learn on, but.....I am persuing a hobby/obsession with photography and he didn't want to buy one camera now and down the road hear how I "needed" a better camera to produce better product. Plus, there was an AMAZING deal on the one he bought so he jumped in with two feet and the sales person saw him coming a mile away! :)

I am just learning how to use Photoshop Elements and Picasa, along with the editing software that came with my camera. I am trying out all Adobe programs before I commit to purchasing one or another. I feel that is important to ensure I get a program I can use and understand.

Last Saturday we took the kids out to the playground/park here in town. It was the first time I got to play around with my new Nikon D40. Previously I have only had an Olympus P&S and my mom's old film Minolta camera. She doesn't have the instruction manual to it and I could not find one so I was getting very frustrated needless to say trying to learn her camera.

Saturday I did learn a lot about my camera. I am learning about how to adjust the aperture, ISO, white balance and how being closer to your subject really is better. Here are two pictures I took, I have not edited them yet....I did but for some reason it won't upload the edited photos...working on that.

Please Pray for Hailey

A friend of mine that I have met through this wonderful blog world lives in Denver, CO. Her daughter Hailey is 4 and dealing with some very serious conditions. Some of them are seizures and a condition called encephalopathy (I hope I spelled that right). SHe is such an amazingly sweet and giving little girl.

Robin is a wonderful mom. She has three children, one of them is in Heaven. Her husband Jeremy is awaiting medical seperation from the military after coming back from the Middle East. They are having a really rough time with getting the disability benefits he deserves and because of Hailey's condition, their medical care is not able to help after a certain point is reached. They are very tired, worn, frustrated and heart broken.

Three days ago, Hailey went into the hospital with another episode. This is the worst they have ever seen her. Early this mornign the catheter was lost in her arm and now is lost somewhere in her body. THe doctors aren't sure what to do to find it and once they do how to remove it. There is risk of it being in her heart or lungs.

At noon today she crashed hard. She stopped breathing and technically died. The rapid response team was able to stabilize her and she is not intubated and in ICU. She is awaiting a CT Scan, an ultrasound, EEG, EKG, and bloodwork. Please pray for Hailey and for her parents. Please pray for strength and peace. Please pray for the doctors and medical staff that they would be able to figure out her problems and that they would act swiftly and safely to bring Hailey out of this.

For up to date information, Robin's blog is http://www.visbalfamily.blogspot.com/ . She is also on Twitter and Facebook under robinvisbal. She can't update her blog that often but said that she wil be tweeting as often as possible to keep current prayer requests.

Thanks so much.

Results and stuff...

This morning I woke up to hearing words like, "delays" and "closures" on the radio. I layed there in bed thinking, SERIOUSLY??!!? I got up and sure enough the white stuff was coming down hard. In no time we had about 2 inches and then suddenly the sun came out and it stopped...then it started..then it stopped and started...you know.
Caileigh's school was not delayed unfortunately so off to school she went but before I could walk out the door to drive her to school, the phone rang.

It was Dr F, the GI specialist in Denver. He apologized for me getting some incorrect information and the need to worry based on how the initial results were given to me. He said all tests came back...NORMAL!!! Praise God it was not this GI disease we were all worried about, and my mother in law's fear (and in the back of all our minds) of cancer. The bad thing is, he has no idea what to tell me. He can't explain the symptoms or the irritation.

So the decision for now is to do nothing. When Braedon goes back into another episode of this we will pack our bags and go to Denver for 2-3 days so Braedon can be hospitalized. Not really what I want but there is a degree of relief knowing they will test him in house on food and monitor his stats, taking samples of stool and what have you while we are there. I just have to wait for another episode to pop up.

So thank you everyone for praying for the results to come back clear. Please pray he goes into his next episode when Soapy can be home and help me with Caileigh or she will have to miss school (or something, just not sure what that will be yet) and that the doctors can see first hand what is happening and can help us solve this mystery. It gets pretty frustrating watching him in pain and holding him down to change his diaper and put cream on him when he looks like he has 2nd degree burns all over his bottom area.

Other news--Love A Thon results: Angela and Brittany I am so sorry that I have slacked on getting this sorted out, things have just been overwhelming the last few weeks. I have decided to give you BOTH a gift card for Mary Kay!! Please email me and give me your contact information and I will get it to you. I have a website but am having trouble with it right now, it should be up and running soon and then you can order from there. :) Check out these girls sites, they are super cute and have some great ideas in them!

Well, that is all for now! Later I am going to put up some pictures (FINALLY) of Easter and random things the kids have been up to lately. Have a great day y'all!!! :)

Waiting....

We are still waiting. We went to Denver last Thursday, April 1st for Braedon's appointment for his colonoscopy and endoscopy. They did it and he did farely well coming out of it, we were able to go home that day. YAY!
What I didn't like was the consult afterwards. The doctor came and found me in the lobby and went over the pictures. She said the colon did not look good. I asked what could cause what she saw and she said she couldn't tell me, not until after the results come back from the biopsies but that they took several good spots so they should get the information they need. She told me to start calling first thing Monday morning for results so I did. I left message after message only to get a reply that afternoon that the nurse talked to the doctor and he wants to talk to me personally and will call me when he has a moment in between patients. It is Tuesday, still no word, I only know after I called this morning that it can take him 48 hours to call me back.

I am trying very hard not to get frustrated and angry, though I want to be right now. I am trying very hard not to worry and be scared. I am trying very VERY hard to give it to God and let Him do with it as He wills. A woman at Target tonight stopped to say hi to Braedon. She was not able to ever have children but she loves them so much. He was very happy and social. They played peek-a-boo for a bit and then she looked at me and asked if he was healthy. I was somewhat puzzled and told her for the most part but that we were actually waiting for results. She immediately put her hand on him and started praying and all I could do was stand there and hold him and cry. It touched me so much that a perfect stranger felt lead to pray for him.

So tonight I am waiting and praying for peace and comfort. I am waiting on God to show us what miraculous things he has in store for Braedon. I believe He has a great work to do in by son and I am excited to see how it all unfolds.

Thy Will Be Done Lord

This week is such a sensitive week for me, each year. Ever since I was a little girl, I have had an unreal realization of what Holy Week is all about. Maybe it was hearing the story read each year, going to the Good Friday services, watching the Passion plays (I am sure the "guard" that ripped Rainbow Bright from my terrified hands as he walked down the aisle when I was 5 years old didn't help)....who knows. But as a child I had it in my mind that when Good Friday rolled around and noon hit....that was it. NO. MORE. JESUS!

That's right, I convinced myself that each year from noon on Good Friday until sunrise on Easter, Jesus took a break and the world was on their own. Not even the comfort of knowing my parents were there could help me. I would lay awake until I absolutely passed out praying God would send Jesus back soon or that the sun would just come up. Somehow seeing the promise of light renewed my strength that this weekend was almost over and the joy of Christ's ressurection was almost here.

I was the first to jump out of bed on Easter to get dressed and go to church. Forget the Easter Bunny, I wanted my dad up and dressed, driving me to church so we could set up the sound for sunrise service (my parents were very active in the music ministry...thus meaning my sister and I followed suit). When those first rays of sunshine peaked through the clouds I could breathe. It's like I tried to carry the weight of the world on my tiny shoulders for three days....
                                  That is a lot of weight!!!

I have since grown out of this misconception but it is something I always reflect on each year. God's shoulders must be pretty tired! The burden I tried to put on myself was unbearable and I was only a kid, trying to deal with the weight of my world. I am so blessed to have the Lord on my side; he is always there.

It is me who is not always there and for this I am struggling right now. This week Braedon is having some procedures done at Childrens' Hospital in Denver. I am a wreck to say the least. I can't shake this feeling of complete and utter panic like fear that there is something the doctors are missing. These tests Thursday he has not done well with in the past, he has had reactions to the anesthesia and that has me extremely nervous. Once again, I am trying to carry the weight of my world on my shoulders instead of giving it to God.

All the way to Denver today I kept repeating in my head, "Let your will be my will, let Your ways be my ways. Lord, let Your will be done in my life and in Braedon's life. Lord, I committ my child to you." --I mean it most of the time but it sure would be nice if I meant it all of the time. I so badly desire to align my life with God's purpose for me; fear and insecurity hold me back. What if I disappoint Him? What if I can't do what he calls me to do perfectly? What if the adjustments I have to make (referencing a book study, Experiencing God, that our small group is doing and I plan on touching on each week as I work through this journey) are greater than what I think I can stand? What if those adjustments meant giving up control of my children and the well being I think is best for them to be God's idea for their well being? What if God's idea is not what I want? How can I be at peace with this???

How was Jesus able to be at peace with "this" -the "Thy will be done" thing? How could he sit there knowing he would be crucified and not run away? He could have, he was fully capable of that decision. How was He able to give it all to God and voluntarily walk into all the pain he had to experience? How could he hang from the cross and in one breath ask God why he had been forsaken and then give himself wholly over to his Father? How??      I   WANT  THAT   PEACE!!!!!!!!

I want to be able to give up control. I want to be able to breathe easily at night when I got to bed knowing God's "got this". I want to be able to sit calmly through Braedon's procedure Thursday not anxious over the outcome. I want to give God all my worries and pain for I am too tired to carry their heavy burden any longer.

LORD, please take these from me. Renew a right spirit within me. Cast me not away from your presence Lord. You know the plans you have for me, for Caileigh, for Braedon, for Soapy. They are plans to prosper and not to harm, to give hope. Allow me to give up control over the plans for our lives and rest in the peace of knowing that whatever the end result, it was Your plan from the beginning; before I was ever created in my mother's womb.

Lord, let thy will be done.

Real Quick

I can't write long, I have to get ready to go teach my little ones how to dance (or they teach me how to give up control....still not real sure who teaches who sometimes!). I am so excited for those of you who have helped raise money for the love a thon! I know we have reached our goal but I am sure if anyone felt like still donating it would be greatly appreciated and you have a chance to win some really cool prizes on some of the sponsoring blogs!

This week we could really use some prayers. Our house closes Wednesday and after that we will be free from a house in another state that has been weighing us down. Please pray that we don't have any problems getting things signed and turned over to the new owner.

Soapy is returning to traveling this week for work. :( My birthday is on Easter this year and we are all sad that he won't be here to celebrate with us again (he missed last year too, Braedon's first Easter). He is putting in job applications this week and we are praying God will lead us to where we are supposed to be....I am trying to also let go and realize that the right job will come in His time, not mine. We thought he may have a job lead that would get him out of traveling in the next two weeks but it hasn't worked out. I was very dissapointed and kind of upset so I spent some time with God having my attitude adjusted and hearing Him tell me that it wasn't HIS time......lesson learned...until I get impatient again and hear it again (it is my life long challenge).

Most importantly, Braedon goes to Denver Childrens' Hospital this week on Tuesday for an upper GI w/ a follow through and then Thursday for a colonoscopy/endoscopy. I am very nervous about these as last year he came out of it not breathing well and was hospitalized on oxygen. Please pray for him that he comes out ok. Please pray the doctors can find what is bothering him and a cure. Please pray for my nerves as I sit there alone because Soapy will be working Thursday and I have a large unshakeable fear that there is something really wrong that everyone is missing.

Thanks friends, to everyone I know and don't for reading and praying for our little man. :)

It's A.....

Through this crazy space called blogland, I've been privileged to get to know a great lady named Ellyn. She's got quite a story.




She doesn't think she's strong, Ellyn (even after losing her precious Eli, raising funds to allow her deaf fourth-born to hear and surviving a divorce that was just finalized this week), but she's far too strong to ever ask for this kind of help. Well, that's what friends are for, right?! Sarah and Mandy thought up this brilliant Love-A-Thon and we're happy to ask on Ellyn's behalf (and, by the way, she has no idea we are doing this)!



Well ok, she might now.



In order to stay in her home, the only home Seth has ever known, she needs to raise $2,400 by the end of the month. If you don't know her story, and why she is in danger of losing the family home, just click here. But we're warning you: you will fall head-over-heals in love!



To keep this little fundraiser completely legal, you will not be donating money in exchange for raffle tickets. Simply donate (any amount helps), and then comment to tell us you have done so. Mandy is giving away a blog makeover, and Sarah is giving away four (yea!) Jared Anderson CD's. Renee is also giving away some fab prizes on her blog so go check them all out! I will give away a Mary Kay $10 gift certificate to someone who comments after donating on my blog!

If you are interested in the blog makeover (and I know you are!), comment on Mandy's post. If you are interested in some rockin' praise music (and why wouldn't you be?), comment on Sarah's post. If you are interested in Renee's prizes, comment on her blog. If you are interested in my prize, comment on mine. If you're interested in all of them, comment on all of them! :)




Wanna help more?! Of course you do!



If you'd like to place this Chip-in on your blog and possibly offer your own prize to commenters, just let Sarah know. She'll put you on a list so that all Love-a-thon participants will have a chance to enter your giveaway as well!