Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Happy B-Day sweet Braedon

I know this is late but it's been a big day for us! We have had so much fun playing and getting prepared for your birthday party/Thanksgiving dinner Thursday. I wanted to document your first birthday though so I and you will have it to read in the future. So here it goes:

You are the love of my life and have absolutely stollen my heart. I can't believe you are already one year old! It seems like yesterday that I was still pregnant with you, laying in the hospital bed anxiously awaiting your arrival. The labor was so long and soo difficult but at 12:49pm there you were! So perfect and sweet and absolutely breathtaking. I will never forget that day.
You are such a blessing from Heaven to me and your father. We love you so much! Caileigh loves you so much too and it is wonderful to see how yall light up every time yall are together.

I love our snuggles. I wish they could be at any other time than the middle of the night but I love them just the same and know that some day soon you will outgrow that need for being close. I am holding onto every precious moment I can! Your love has helped heal my heart and I love you for that too!

Your sweet little smile and dark blues eyes can stop my heart and take away the feelings of fatigue on the days I am so far beyond drained.

You are my sweet, sweet little man and always will be. Thank you for letting me be your Mommy, I know I am thankful that you are my son.

Love you with all my heart! Happy first birthday!


Monday, November 23, 2009

Hot and Healthy...week 4..I think :)

H&H Button

This week has been horrible and frustrating and uninspiring!
I have eaten so well this week (except for one day that I did not totally blow) and thought I was going to be able to hit the gym every day.

Instead....I have been sick with what I now know is a major sinus infection. With the feeling of death yesterday, I reluctantly shelled out the copay to be seen at the doctors. Glad I did now though!

So instead of kickin it in the gym non stop, I spent it in bed. I only got about 3 hours in total for the week. I am however getting tons and tons of water in my diet no and that is great! I LOVE the pilates moves and do them every day, even if I haven't gotten to the gym. They are helping with my flexibility and my dancing too. I dug out my prego pilates video and have done that with my daughter.

I am not feeling so hot this week but was up until I got sick so I am sure this has just been a down week due to the infection. I did have some fast food, but I didn't get fries (got a side salad) and got chicken strips instead of a burger.

Hoping the next few days can help correct last week and prevent Thursday from being overwhelming. Good news is everyone is coming over to celebrate Braedon's birthday for Thanksgiving so I am doing all the cooking. Hot and Healthy being served up for everyone this holiday season! :)

MckLinky Blog Hop

My Favorite Things!

I follow a wonderful woman's blog and she has put together a contest of her favorite things. She's listed her 5 favorite things with the intention that after everyone has posted, it will give tons of Christmas shopping ideas. I think this is great!
Being sick, I almost missed it but I am going to jump on in here and hope someone may see this last minute and join in too!

My 5 Favorite Things!

1. My dance shoes....I love taking ballet. It is a wonderful form of exercise and expression.

2. My Mary Kay products. I have used their skin care since I was 8 and I absolutely love it and love selling it! There are so many cool things and wonderful colors. The quality is great and the price is wonderful!

3. My camera. I have an Olympus...not what I would like but the picture quality isn't bad for a P&S. I am saving up for a Cannon xti...that is going to be a good day!

4. My Victorias Seceret bras! I just go them and they are wonderful and comfortable. It's definitely an investment but they fit perfectly and last such a long time!

5. My Josh Groban Noel Christmas cd from last year. I have been listening to it in the car a lot lately!

Well, those are just a few. Happy Thanksgiving and Merry Christmas everyone! Have fun shopping.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Hot and Healthy Week 3

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Sorry, this is going to be as organized as I can be right now, as I have had 2 hours of sleep and I am crashing BIG time!

This past week was not what I wanted it to be. I have tried the pilates 3 days this past week, danced 4 hours and did kettleball workout once. I have wanted to start running again. I really REALLY want to run a half marathon this spring! I need the motivation to get out and run...just have NO motivation to do it in the snow :). Not that it's an excuse but we had Braedon at the doctors twice this week for allergic reactions and then Friday morning for tubes....I am so ready for my hubby to come home tomorrow!!! :)

My diet has been for the most part great. I only went to Chickfila once but got a salad. I did have a piece of chocolate cake my dad brought home (but I spread it out over 4 days....two or three bites a night so does that count?? :) ) My biggest concern over my diet is still the water intake and we have had to put Braedon on a formula for the most part so he isn't getting much breast milk now. The temptations to eat more freely are really great as I am not restricted for the health of my son.

It will all work out!..workout...haha! :P

Sorry this is late but I just got back from Denver Children's and the kids are in bed! Going to work harder this week so I can get the weight advantage before the holiday! Can anyone help me out with why I have not lossed pound weight but my clothes are fitting loser??? That is very frustrating!

MckLinky Blog Hop

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Thank God for small groups!

I should be going to bed but I wanted to post a small preface to a longer post tomorrow. Yesterday I attended the Focus On Parenting conference here in Colorado Springs at Focus on the Family. It was A.MA.ZING!!!!!!!! I learned so much! Have you ever been somewhere that you just knew God was calling you to? A place where you just knew he brought you to in order to tell you something? Something that will help you grow?

That is how I felt yesterday. The registration was money I had a hard time spending but I felt God pushing me to fill out the registration. I told Soapy I needed to go, that with the current stresses of our life and the road block I have found myself at lately in parenting with Caileigh, I knew God wanted me there to learn something. LEARN I DID!

We heard from several speakers and over the next few days I will blog about each one. I think it's important to give them each their own time becuase they each had so much to say.

I realized a lot about my own personal struggles. Struggles I think I knew I had between me and God but was easier to deny until now. I realized I feel let down by God, that I was hurt, my life has not turned out the way I thought it should. I didn't have the perfect husband, the perfect marriage, the way that perfect marriage made a perfect family......seeing a pattern here???? I have felt that the hurts and hangups of my past were God's way of punishing me for something. That maybe I didn't deserve a Godly husband and a happy marriage. That I didn't deserve a close knit relationship with my daughter and the children I have lost were in some way punishment for something I had done to let God down.

I am here to say, nothing could be more wrong...screwed up...TOTALLY TOTALLY off base! I know that! I have always known that but the hurt I have felt through events in my marriage have caused me to have trouble trusting. Not only trusting my husband (which is very unhealthy and we are MUCH better at now, we have been attending counseling ever since and I encourage anyone experiencing hurdles in their marriage to seek out a third party--qualified third party and talk it out. We aren't fixed by any means but we are working on it) but also trusting God to take care of me, my kids, my marriage. I realized it's easy for me to be engaged in a relationship with Christ until it gets too deep and then I back out. I feel trapped and vulnerable. At that moment I am transparent and that scares me. Scares me to think God could see me for me, all the sin I am and that He would turn away. That the hang ups I have created for myself are too much, the way I project them into my marriage and how they affect my parenting.

I got home last night and my dad sat down to hear about the conference. I told him what I was thinking and he told me something that stung but was very much the truth, "Christy, your problems in parenting and between you and Soapy have nothing to do with them. Your problems are a result of your troubled relationship with God. You can't blame this on anyone or anything else, this is your problem." He was right. After thinking on it last night and being faced again with this idea in our small group study this evening, I realize the conflict in my relationship with God directly affects my relationships with others. It causes me not to give over my marriage and my children to God because I fear losing them too. I fear God not caring for them the way I want him to. The irony is, God's will is not determined by my desires. I have to give up all to Him and rest assured that God is going to protect my worries. I have to know that what I hav been through is in no way punishment. God won't give me more than I can handle and if I had not been through some of these building moments I would not be growing my relationship with God.

My small group tonight allowed me to really see how my insecurities with God are affecting my ability to be a Godly wife and mother. I so desperately want to be both but first I need to work on me and my relationship with the Big Man upstairs. Once that is right, the rest of my relationships will benefit and thrive from it.

Good night. I know this probably came off as mixed ramblings but I will sleep better with it off my mind and on paper. Goodnight! :)

Friday, November 13, 2009

Oh the sweet sweet sounds!

Braedon is out of surgery and has been taking a nap. He did very well during the surgery. His right ear had a lot of puss and fluid in it so they drained it out and inserted the two tubes.
Prior to surgery, we got there early, Braedon and I went for a walk around the surgery center and I pulled him in his first wagon ride! He had so much fun until my dad showed up and then he wanted "Papa" to pick him up and get him outta there!
He struggled a bit with the anesthesia..I thought I was going to end up KO-ed but finally he started to cooperate and we were able to hold the mask on him to get him ready for surgery. It was a bit emotional for me to watch him fight and then suddenly go limp and his body shake. After the surgery I was able to go back to recovery and could hear him as I walked down the hall. He was awake and mad. He was ok. Angry but ok. I fed him, not that it helped :) We waited a while to make sure this time he kept his O2 sats up (he did) and then we were let go. When we got home he snuggled for a bit and then went straight to sleep! He's been sleeing for 3 hours!

Dr. C said the next couple days may be touchy for him just because he is going to have an immediate change in his ability to hear. Sounds are going to be much clearer and louder. His hearing before was much like that of plugged ears when flying or driving into higher altitudes. Everything was very muffled and distant sounding. Now it is very clear and much louder to him. Dr. C said it might scare him for a few days until he gets used to his new hearing.

We are all optimistic that it is going to help a lot of things! He is going to stop having ear infections! He is going to start hearing all the beautiful, sweet sounds of this wonderful  world. Hopefully it is going to turn his speech and balance around as well. I am so excited to see what changes we have in store!

Five Question Friday

I saw this on Mama M's blog and thought it sounded like something fun to do as I sit here with my baby boy sleeping in my arms. Here it goes! :)

1. What is your favorite "eat" on Thanksgiving?

Wow! I love the holidays. Now I love Thanksgiving even more as my little man's birthday is that week! I think my most favorite dish is my turkey. I baste it in butter (or EVOO now that I have made it a couple times and am looking, then add pineapple and rosemary. It cooks very quickly no matter how big the turkey is, it cooks in about 2.5 hours. It's so juicy but not sweet like you would think it would be from the pineapple.

2. What is the name your best girl friend and the best trait about her or how you met (or heck, both!!)

Ane, actualy it's Ariane. She's from Brazil and we met when our husbands had first joined the Navy. We were next door neighbors, were pregnant with our first two together and also with the second two we were due on the same day. She and I are so much a like and we have so much in common. We act and look alike and consider each other sisters. We even share the same last name!
Our kids are the same ages and love to be with each other. Our husbands are best friends as well and we can't wait to be able to live close to each other again. She is so honest and kind and I know she would be here for me in a heartbeat if I needed her; no matter the cost or time of day.

3. What would you say is one of your "weirdest" quirks?

Hmm, the one thing that drove my husband nuts when we were first married was how I put the comforter on. It had flowers on it and I had to have the blossoms at the top and the stems pointing towards the bottom of the bed. Because flowers grow up not down...duh! :)

There are many more but he isn't here to help me think of them. :)

4. What is your favorite genre of music? (Hip hop? Classical? Rock? etc.)

Hmm, I don't care for heavymetal, hard rock or rap. I mostly listen to Contemporary Christian, Country, some classical when my husband lets me. I used to sing with the Symphony and loved it.

5. Are you a Night Owl...or an Early Bird?

I am definitely more of a night owl instead of an early bird. I seem to handle this post-pregnancy's no sleep regimin better than the first. If I got to sleep more than 4 or 5 hours I might be more of a morning person. They key is to let me have 20 minutes to myself and wake up without anyone asking for anything, nagging...etc.

MckLinky Blog Hop

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Hot and Healthy...week 2

So week one did not go as well as I had hoped but I was still able to get in 3 hours of dance (180 min total!). It wasn't my normal load but with two kids sick...I am happy I got that much done.
The diet definitely is getting back on track. Now that Braedon seems to be handling more in his diet, I have been slacking in watching what I eat as much. Still not horrible but definitely not as good as I was being. I spent this week trying to get myself back on track. I actually went through the cubboards and threw out things that I knew would tempt me. That didn't go over well with the hubby at times because they were things he liked but he'll get over it. :) I figure he doesn't need them and I explained that I needed his help on this so I could reach my goal. He seemed ok then.

This week I am going for no cokes (as a Southerner this does not refer to actual Coke but to all carbonated bvgs). I picked up some limes and lemons and plan to have them in my water to change it up a bit when I get tired of plain water. I am also logging my intake so I can see what I am eating and how much. I got away from logging what I ate because everything I was eating I knew Braedon could get through nursing. Just because it's healthy for him and not going to cause allergy probs doesn't mean I can continue to eat. Everything in moderation. :)

I got 45 min of pilates in tonight and want to have twice that amount tomorrow. Braedon goes in for surgery Friday morning so Friday and Saturday could be challenging...we will see. I am praying for the best!

I am thankful for....

I would love to start some posts related to the upcoming holidays to see how others celebrate and what traditions they may have, etc. I really would like this to be an open post that we can learn about each other and other's cultures and families. Please feel free to jump in and comment!

This post, I want to talk about what we are thankful for. I would like to see what miracles God is working in other's lives, what blessings have been given to everyone. It doesn't matter how large or small they are. It could be that you got to sleep in this morning while normally your children have you up by 6am. It could be that you got a good grade on a recent test. It could be a successful surgery or the fact that you were blessed with an anonymus gift that helped you and your family make ends meet in this struggling economy. Anything! I want this to be a post that can inspire others and give hope as we face seperate struggles through life.

Right now I have A LOT to be thankful for. My children are getting healthy and Friday afternoon Braedon will prayerfully be able to hear better and regain his small hearing loss. I am thankful I even HAVE children; that God allowed me to make it through these two pregnancies. It is amazing and a miracle!

I am thankful for having a day to relax and not have an agenda so I can spend time with my daughter. We are going to start working on our homemade Christmas ornaments that we are giving as gifts this year. With things being tight, we are making our gifts. I am so excited! It will truly be a way to give without the stress of how much we have spent. Caileigh is really excited too!

I am thankful we have insurance right now as we have been to doctors a lot lately and have several more over the next few weeks. I am thankful my wonderful husband sticks with his job so he can take care of us; even though it keeps him gone more than he's home. I love him for loving us enough to work so hard! Thanks honey!!!

I am thankful my parents have let us live with them for nearly 2 years. While it was no one's plan for us to stay this long, I am grateful we are not "on the streets" or in total financial ruin as we wait for our house to sell back in Texas. They have 100% shown how Jesus intended us to be there for others. THANK YOU!

I am thankful for my health. Thankful that the mammogram I had came out negative for a lump; that I will not be faced with breast cancer. My prayers go out to the women and families that are faced with this. The thoughts that race through your head while you wait for the test and then wait for the results are horrible. Every time I looked at my family, my children I cried wondering if I would be able to help them grow up, if I would be able to care for them if I had to go through was a humbling time in my life and I am so thankful God has protected me and allowed me to get healthy results. My prayers and sympathy extend to those that are walking this road no matter what type of cancer it is.

Finally, I am thankful for my faith. For having a loving Heavenly Father who is always here no matter how nice...or hateful I have been. He doesn't leave me when I try to go it on my own, He waits patiently for me to return. He cares for my children in Heaven as well as my children here on earth. He protects my family and allows me to grow daily! He has saved me and has a special place for me waiting in Heaven. He is such a wonderful God!

So! What are you thankful for?? I would love to hear and rejoice in your blessings!!! Have a wonderful Veterans Day!


Veteran's Day

Happy  Veteran's Day everyone! Thank you to all those who have served (thanks Daddy! thanks Honey!) and to those who are serving now (thanks Byron and Ane! thanks Kala and Nick! thank you to all those I don't know or haven't mentioned). We are so lucky to live in a country that is protected so well. I am so grateful to those men and women who are away from their families so I can sleep in peace at night and to their spouses and children for sacrificing their family member to secure my safety.

Thank You!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Braedon is getting tubes.....

So I took Braedon to the ENT this morning....I thought maybe he would give us an idea of another way to drain his ears. Instead they booked him for surgery this Friday...the 13th. Is that bad that his surgery is on the 13th???, not that I believe in that stuff...because I don't. But still.....

I guess I am nervous because last time Braedon was under sedation he came out having problems breathing and was put on oxygen for 2 days...he was only supposed to stay in over night. Plus Soapy isn't home, he left yesterday for work so I will be going it alone this time. I have Caileigh to think of, she has school Friday morning and I think I have someone that can take her but I am still nervous. The thing I am dreading the most is having to help hold him still while they put the mask on him. He fought a LONG TIME and it was hard on me to watch him cry so hard. No he's older and bigger and I am going to be a nervous wreck. Pray for us that things go well. I know it's nothing major, and it could be a lot worse but I don't think any procedure is easy for mom's to give up control.

I guess that is why I constantly give control over to's a life long process really. Daily I submit to God, and ask him to take control of my life and my struggles. Daily I ask for forgiveness for failing and accomplishing this goal. Daily He forgives me and takes up my cross again. Such a wonderful Father!

Monday, November 9, 2009

A Thankful Heart

I am in such awe and admiration of our God right now! Today was just another day for most but for the McKinney family it was a day filled with miracles and proof that our God is a Mighty God! Stellan and his mom headed for Boston late last week to begin the process of a possible (but inevitable) heart surgery that was scheduled for tomorrow morning. After Sunday early afternoon, it was obvious this procedure would have to be done and soon. Today was an unimaginably hard day for both Stellan and his parents. His mom, Jennifer, sat and watched as he struggled to hold on and at one point flat lined. He was in need of a miracle. Tonight, God gave him that miracle. His doctors were faced with having to sacrifice a vital part of his heart that would have required a permanant pacemaker when one of them had a risky idea. They went with it and it worked!!!!
Stellan is SVT free!! He is beating in normal sinus rythm and did not need a pacemaker. Upon reading this news I cried! I cried and thanked God for the miraculous work He performed today and for letting His will be for Stellan to live. His dad has finally been able to make it to Boston to be with him and Jennifer after having struggles of his own at the airports. They are together and I am so thankful!

This news makes me so thankful for my family. For the overall health that we have. Thankful that God has taken care of Braedon this week as he had the swine flu and had an exceptionally high fever for several days. Thankful that so far, no one else has caught it. Thankful that his respiratory problems, while they sound bad, have not caused him to develop pneumonia. I am thankful.

I am also thankful to Jennifer, for her faith. I don't know how she does it but I want to have faith that strong. I love my Lord and feel very strong in my faith but I am encouraged by Jennifer's ability to let go and let God take control. She was able to let Him have Stellan, no matter what the outcome was to be and she was ok with that. Of course she wanted her baby back in her arms but she realized that God's plan may not be her plan. I have learned so much from her and through their struggles with Stellan's SVT, I have grown closer to God and strengthened my relationship with Him. Thank you Jennifer!

Last, I am thankful for my husband and the life he works so hard to provide for us. His job is not the best and the sacrifice he makes of not being home is often very hard. We are searching and waiting on God to bless us with a job that will allow Soapy to stay home with us. For now though, we are thankful for the time we do get together. I am thankful that God has helped us grow through A LOT of struggles in our marriage; without Him we would surely have ended in divorce. We have a lot of growing to do still and things that we need to work through, but thanks to our Heavenly Father, I know we will make it and come out stronger and closer than we could ever have imagined we would be.

So tonight, in honor of Stellan, I am thankful. I have a thankful heart for all of my blessings, all of my weaknesses that provide me an opportunity for growth, for all of my family and friends, and for my God. Without Him, none of this would be possible.

Goodnight! :)

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Hot and Healthy Through the Holidays

So, I have found this challenge through in her blog community and I think it's a great idea! Go to to find out how to sign up and participate. The idea is we are all encouraging and challenging each other through the New Year to get healthy and lose weight. Everyone will post on Tuesdays with their progress, will receive their weekly challenge from the administrators and on Thursdays there will be tips/ideas for how to make your goals a success.

So here it goes.

I have spent the last 11 months chasing my newborn son and 5 year old daughter. Braedon has had many health issues that caused me to be on a very strict diet in order to continue breast feeding. I have been so excited to see how God has used this time to help me lose weight. I have lost all my pregnancy weight and 35 pounds on top of that; a total of 75 pounds since Nov 24, 2008!!!!!

I still need to lose about 15-20 pounds and really need to tone more than anything at this point. I want to continue to breast feed but am having a lot of problems with my supply so I don't think I will be able to keep it up much longer. This scares me because then the temptations to eat freely will be back. Right now I can control what I eat for the sake of my son.

I want so much though to be able to end this year knowing I have completed my weight loss goal and all of it is behind me. I need motivation though. I need someone to push/challenge me; I am a VERY competitive person (in a healthy way). My husband travels a lot and I don't have a workout partner so I end up spending most of my workout time teaching dance and trying to take a class of my own here and there. I need someone I can check in to say, "Hey I went to the gym today!"  I LOVE TO WORKOUT and I LOVE the gym. I just need someone to help get me in the pattern of going.

I am excited that this group will give me the challenge and accountability to do this. Good luck everyone!!!